I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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