he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
