I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
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