dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize