So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Randomize
