he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize