It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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