Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
