i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
