just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
