let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
