There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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