You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
