This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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