i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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