I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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