i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
