shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
