i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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