I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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