Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I love you.
Bad choice
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