Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
