I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
