if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
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And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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