I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
