What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
