I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
I puked a lego.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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