watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Randomize