are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Randomize
