Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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