"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
