Whatcha textin bout Willis?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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