that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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