Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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