I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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