Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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