I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
