I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
