I am puke
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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