where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
