office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.