Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
My hand turned me down
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We had to coat check the pizza.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."