Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
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