Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
