Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize