fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
