How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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