he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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