And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
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the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
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