I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I will pee on everything he values.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
