you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize
