all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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