i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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